Most churches don’t teach about marriage from ‘the pulpit’; they leave it until people have found their marriage partner, and then some might offer engagement/marriage courses. Perhaps that’s leaving it a bit too late?
The biblical view of marriage is so different from society’s worldview, that all young people and adults would benefit from regular teaching about Christian marriage, so that whatever their past experience, they can build firm foundations for potential marriage in the future. At the same time, all engaged and married couples can strengthen their relationship further through using the many resources available to help them do so. The resources below can be helpful for those who are single, dating, engaged or married.
Engagement
Single Dating Engaged Married
Ben Stuart, 2017
Includes ‘How to know you know’.
Ready for Marriage?
Nicky and Sila Lee, 2010
7 tests of love designed to reveal whether your relationship has the foundations upon which to build a strong marriage.
101 Questions to ask Before You Get Engaged
H. Norman Wright, 2004
“A series of soul-searching questions – even difficult ones that need to be addressed – to help you discern if you’ve met ‘the one’”.
Rules of Engagement
Katharine and Richard Hill, 2009
How to How to Plan a Successful Wedding and How to Build a Marriage That Lasts
The Pre-Marriage Course (Alpha)
The Pre-Marriage Course is a series of five sessions, designed for couples considering marriage, whether engaged or not, and wishing to build a strong and lasting relationship.
Care for the Family Pre-Marriage Sessions
A four-session marriage preparation course that equips couples with the tools they need to build a strong and healthy marriage that lasts a lifetime.
Marriage
7 Reasons Your Church Needs More Men: How to lead a gender balanced church supporting healthy singleness, dating, marriage and youth (The Engage Network, 2018)
See Chapter 9 ‘Marriage: what would it look like if things were working well in the church?’
With lots of practical tips for couples to flourish in their situation, and for local churches.
The Marriage Book
Nicky and Sila Lee, 2012
The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God
Tim Keller, 2011
Married for God: Making your marriage the best it can be
Christopher Ash, 2007
Marriage: Sex in the Service of God
Christopher Ash, 2003
The 60 Minute Marriage
Rob Parsons, 2016
Just Sex: Is it ever just sex?
Guy Brandon, 2009
Parenting
- “It is common for high levels of Christian commitment to flow down the generations…but…The biological replacement rate of committed Christians is only just over 50%” (Evangelical Alliance, 2012, How’s the Family?)
- How is your church supporting ‘spiritually single’ parents, where one partner is a Christian and the other is not?
- How is your church supporting young people who are ‘spiritually fatherless’ – how many older male Christian role models do they have in their lives?
Parenting can involve many joys and many challenges. Christian parents need to disciple their children to grow in all aspects of their lives, including how to do godly relationships well. Churches need to support parents to do this.
7 Reasons Your Church Needs More Men: How to lead a gender balanced church supporting healthy singleness, dating, marriage and youth (The Engage Network, 2018)
See Chapter 10 ‘Parenting and discipleship around young people’s dating and relationships: what would it look like if things were working well in the church?’
And Chapter 11 ‘Youth work and discipleship around young people’s dating and relationships: what would it look like if things were working well in the church?’ …for lots of practical tips for parents, youthworkers and churches.
Courses and Resources
The Marriage Courses
Care for the Family
Family Life UK
Toucan Together
The Toucan app helps you make the most of those spare moments in your day to invest in your relationship. Use it to help build a happier, healthier life together today.
New Wine
A number of churches in the New Wine Network (and other networks) run a programme called Circle of Security Parenting®. To find out more about this approach and how it’s used in the UK please visit the Connected Lives website.
Prepare-Enrich
https://www.prepare-enrich.com
The Prepare-Enrich programme helps couples prepare for marriage, enrich their relationship, or review and improve their co-parenting by taking stock of their strengths and growth areas. It uses the world’s leading research-based tool for improving couple relationships.
Marriage Prep in-a-day
TightKnots
Marriage Care
Mothers Union Groups & Branches
https://www.mothersunion.org/get-involved/groups-and-branches
Freedom In Christ
The Evangelical Alliance runs Time to Talk, a resource that promotes better conversations about Relationship and Sex Education
Other Cloud-Townsend Resources
Free video advice from US Christian Psychologists Dr Henry Cloud and Dr John Townsend on issues relating to spiritual life, emotional struggles, singleness, dating, relationships, marriage, parenting, goals and successes, leadership.
